What it means to be a American (and Mexican)

This is a straight up "turn back now if you don't want to talk politics" post, sorry!

It's really hard to be an American right now.

I was just at the USMNT friendly against Turkey over the weekend with the American Outlaws. In the handful of times that I have physically gone to a U.S. game and tailgated with the Outlaws, sat with the Outlaws, and cheered with the Outlaws, I have been filled with an overwhelming sense of pride and community. This is a group that is proud to support American soccer. They’re proud to support what American soccer means, even though the performance of the team often leaves us walking away feeling less than great about where American soccer is relative to the world, but that's purely on the merits of sport.

When you look at the US men's national team, it’s a group of young men that come from a variety of different backgrounds. More and more players are sharing their backgrounds that heavily involve immigration either to the US or to elsewhere. Often these young men do not spend tremendous amounts of time in the U.S due to upbringing or professional opportunities! However, they still play for the red, white, and blue, they still feel pride wearing that jersey. And it's part of what makes this team so compelling and part of what makes the community around the team so important to someone like myself.

I'm a Mexican, adopted person who's not trying to play that I live an immigrant experience. But my siblings and I were often a part of a handful of non white people in spaces. We have a tremendous amount of privilege that comes from growing up in an affluent white family, but there's always been the recognition that we were different than others. For me, part of my journey in life has been learning to accept that duality; I am both Mexican by blood, and that gifts me a rich cultural lineage that I am tied to, and gives me a sense of joy and purpose. But I am also an American because my birth mother understood the gift that was birthright citizenship, and my parents lived the American dream by adopting four Mexican children. The America they grew up with encouraged creation of diverse families and pushing avenues (like adoption) that allow people to chase dreams that they might not have been able to do naturally.

When you look around the world and you see what's happening in Los Angeles, in New York, in Chicago, it’s so clear ICE, the president, Stephen Miller, and conservative talk show hosts are trying to say that people like me, people who are immigrants, people who are not white natural born Americans, are somehow less than or or are somehow making this country actively worse by actively harming their communities. It's's just fundamentally false, and this is why you're getting the pushback in these cities; We are not in a space or discussion that requires any more interpretation.

We are in an era where people are outright lying because they are angry that immigrants are being better Americans than they ever have been. These angry people have spent their lives hoarding resources, repressing desires, and forcing others to do the same while the immigrant community is why cities and communities thrive with food, both in grocery stores and in restaurants. The immigrant community is why you have local third spaces like bars, and laundromats and a host of other small businesses that are often the only ways for immigrants to get started in this country because no one who had spent decades living here wanted to do the work.

And so to see this level of racism just openly, overtly spoken, is incredibly depressing. As I process all of this, I keep coming back to one question: why am I proud to wear a USA jersey? Why am I proud to be a part of the American Outlaws? Why am I proud to say loud and proud in front of an international sporting audience that I am American when there's a part of me that is Mexican and that part of me is something that the current regime thinks, in their own words, is deplorable.

The reason that I'm proud to be an American is because of the people who are protesting. I'm proud to be an American because of the people who are seeing injustice taking place in their community and say that that is not who or what we are. I’m proud to be an American because the people who are actively protesting ICE and stopping their illegal actions of occupation and detention, much like this countries first group of citizens when the British occupation did the same.

We are continually warped by this idea that being a proud American means having to be proud of the American government and be proud of the American institutions. The reality is that being proud has nothing to do with the institutions or the figureheads at all. The pride is rooted in the community of people who make America a place that feels like home. And those homes are diverse! Those homes are complicated! Those homes are not perfect.

For me, seeing all of these protests defending immigrants who have come into these cities and made them better, that action makes me more proud than ever to stand side by side with them and to say that I am an American. I want to see these communities take the American flag and say that this is a symbol of the immigrants, not a symbol of the oppressors. This is something that I feel like, while small, means so much.

Because at the end of the day, the people in power are old and they are scared, and many of them are not living healthy lives lives and they will die. But the communities that live on are going to be what matter most.

I love the American Outlaws because I fell in love with Clint Dempsey, a white dude who learned soccer on rural backfields in deep Texas with a bunch of Mexicans. I love the American Outlaws because I look around the section and see hispanics, whites, blacks, and Asians all singing songs in both Spanish and English supporting the USA. I love the American Outlaws because they are a community that makes me proud to be an American.

We all have that community. Maybe it’s the bodega, maybe it’s the grocery store, maybe it’s your place of worship; somewhere out there, you have a space made better because of immigrants, and that space makes you proud to be an American. We should wear the colors proudly. And we should fight back against those trying to tear those communities apart wearing those colors proudly.